The Rise of the Phoenix
by margotdavid
Summary: "Sometimes you have to kind of die inside in order to rise from your own ashes and believe in yourself and love yourself to become a new person." How many times can a person reborn without losing herself?
1. Chapter 1

Chapter 1 – A second chance

 _Asgard, 1916_

"Loki will never forgive you if you do this." Frigga told her husband as they stared at the woman lying on the bed, her fair skin looked almost death as her eyes were close and her long white curls cover most of her face and upper body. She looked like a sleeping angel.

"If I don't do this our sons will destroy each other for her." Odin spoke as he watched the powerful orange gem on top of the laying woman chest. "Or someone must worst will destroy her."

"You are talking about Dark Magic. We don't know the consequences of this." The warned him as she saw three people walking around the sleeping woman- they are observing her. "

"I am not planning to make her absorbed the stone for long. I want her to observe some of its power."

"What if it doesn't work? What if she isn't strong enough?"

"We both know she is."

"She only wanted us to make her disappear from our sons' lives. Not –this." She says pointing to the unconscious woman. "What if she loses herself? Or worst?"

"She won't even remember any of us. She will be reborn Frigga. I will send her to Earth. She can have a life without having to live with the pain she caused."

"Pain always comes back. Especially to someone like her."

.

.

.

 _New York City, January 1930_

She looked around as people started to gather around the church. The mass had ended a couple of minutes ago and her mother soon had to leave for work. Sarah Rogers is Catherine's hero. At the age of 13, Catherine Ann Rogers is known by her incredible intelligence. She already helps her mother with nursing. Catherine also know she is actually adopted when she appear, a newborn baby, at her mother's house doorstep. The woman had married Joseph Rogers for a year and they had tried to conceive a child but they were not lucky to that time. So in January 24, 1917, also known as her official birth date she was officially adopted by the couple.

It took more than a year so that Mrs. Rogers found herself pregnant.

Steven Grant Rogers was born in July 4, 1918 barely managing to survive the first days. At the time, Catherine was only a year and six months but she would be dammed if anyone left her leaves her brother's room. She would pray so her brother could survive since she could already at such young age- sometimes her mother would be scared about that. Her brother made it through even if he still had some (many) health problems.

It's because of her brother that she is walking around trying to look for him.

Having it count that it was her brother it shouldn't come as a surprise that she found him with blood on his face having gotten into a fight. Again.

"Steven Grant Rogers!" She spoke with worry and anger as she watched him even noticing the boy next to him. She ran to her brother to get a look at his face. She was taller than him. "You're bleeding." She takes off a handkerchief and starts to clean his face much to his protest. It was a voice behind her coughing that made her turn as she found the boy trying to cover the smile.

"Is this your girl?"

"Did he beat you?" She turns to her brother to ask but didn't allow him to respond because she was already turning to the brown hair boy. "Look I don't care that you are a boy I will make sure you get your backside kick."

"You are a little fireball aren't you?" He spoke as she calm down and took noticed who the boy was- James Buchanan Barnes, also known as her school crush. Well, every school girl crush.

"Its fine Cathy, Bucky was here to help me."

"Cathy, like a little kitten."

"More like a lion." She responds with semi closes eyes as the boy laughs not at her but because of her tiny ferocity little attitude.

And the begging of a very long (and complicated) friendship was formed.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2 – 1936

She put the cold towel on her mother's warm and sweaty face. Sarah Rogers looked so pale and weak that Catherine had to fight the tears every single minute of the day. Her mother contracted tuberculosis a week ago and wasn't getting any better. Catherine, much like she does when Stevie is sick, will be dammed if anyone makes her leave the room. In the last week Catherine is pretty sure she only washed her hair once and its better not think about how many times she actually took a bath.

"You have such a lovely voice." Her mother spoke with a hoarse tone from the throat pain as Catherine spoke her low voice singing. She didn't even realize she was doing it until her mother spoke. "You will have such a bright future I know it."

"Don't talk like that mom. And I will be like you. I will save lives maybe even change the world."

"I know you will." She says coughing as Catherine started to massage her mother's messy hair still denying every the change of losing her mother.

"Don't force yourself to speak. Just relax and rest. Before you know you will be fine."

"You need to rest and eat." Her mother tried to tell her between coughs as Catherine shake her head. "For me, just this one. You can even let Steve come in."

.

.

.

Catherine was not surprise when she saw Bucky outside cooking for them. The man was a blessing most of the times. The other times it was a curse because no matter what he always managed to make her heart beat faster.

6 years and James Buchanan Barnes still hasn't left her system. But she isn't a kid anymore and at 19 she had so many plans that boys can't be a distraction to her- no matter how much he make her smile.

"Even as a ghost you manage to look like a cute kitten." He speaks to her as she drops on the chair, exhaustion getting the best of her. "No sleeping in the table."

"I am not sleeping."

"Sure your eyes are just closing all the time because you are so full of energy. Fireball, eat than you will rest."

"I don't need rest. And how do you I know you won't give me food poising with this food?"

"I still cook better than you."

"Buck, Mama wants to speak with you." Catherine blinked at that but she was too tired to think about what Stevie just said.

.

.

.

The next time she woke up she was in her own bed. She doesn't remember how she got here, but she will beat it was Bucky who took her in. She got off the bed and walked outside the room. There she could see besides her brother and Bucky, the doctor and a priest. She looked between all of them as tears start to form in her eyes.

"No! No! No!" She panic as Bucky approached her. She fought him but eventually he put his large arms around her as she cried eventually stopping hitting on his chest.

Her mother was gone.


	3. Chapter 3- 1938

Chapter 3- 1938

"Close those books and come dancing with us." James asked her as Catherine face looked up. She had three books open around the table and her hair pretty much falling around her.

Catherine changed a lot since her mother passed away. She became so focus on studying and working that she forgot to live. James and Steve were worry about that. They can't remember the last time she managed to relax and have a fun time.

Almost getting to 21, Catherine carried the height of a woman twice her age and people in the block comment her a lot of time. First is because she's a 20 years old girl who never went steady with anyone, actually the only boys she knew were Bucky and Steve. Second she did two things woman did not: work and study. She was called by many 'un-American money grubbers' because of her work as a cleaner and any other she could find and because she wasn't looking for a husband unlike any other female who attended college with her. She wasn't found the need to play dress up and go out. She spends her time between work, home and school barely making in time to bed. She would be happy to get 5 hours of sleep per day. Her hair was always messy and most of the times her clothes didn't mix well but she didn't care. She got so many dirty looks the other day when she went out wearing trousers. Well they were more comfortable and need to be able to move fast to get in time everywhere she wants. So no heels and trousers is becoming her new rule.

"I need to finish this paper for tomorrow James. I can't go out. Besides I need to wake up early I have work in the morning." She spoke returning to her books so she wouldn't see the sad puppy look on his eyes.

That hasn't change about her. James. James has every girl in the block in love with him. James who likes always managed to have a pretty girl in his arm in school. James has her heart in his back pocket and probably doesn't even know. But she had things she wants to do with her life and she has to take care of Stevie.

"Fine, but one day I am going to draw you to a dance."

As soon he leaves with Steve, Catherine open a letter she had hidden in one of her books. They were late in the payment of the house rent and needed money- fast.

.

.

.

"I saw you were looking for a librarian." She spoke to the ball man. She must have spoken this at least 10 times in the last week. No one appears to want a woman working when they can simple give the job to a man. Catherine wants to know who was the first person to ever say that men are better than women, and then she will punch him in the face. She however is desperate for money. Her bills pile up to the point she had to tell Stevie the truth. Her brother just hugged her and told her everything was going to be ok. Next day he quit art school and tried to get a job. He got on was a newspaper boy. She is pretty sure Bucky is behind it. Bucky who a couple of weeks ago put money on her table before he left (he was bring Steve home after they went out). A normal person would accept it and thank him. She however was too stubborn to accept it. She had enough with everyone's pity around her and Steve. How girls would talk about her in school that she is James charity case. She would not let them be right.

Yesterday everything changed. Steve was sick and in desperate need of money. The doctor won't treat him and give him meds until she pays everything she owns him. Not even James can save her from that much debt, especially when they are about to lose the house. Stevie won't survive on the streets.

.

.

.

"How was it?"James asked her as soon she enters the house.

"They will give me an answer tomorrow." She spoke looking at the food on the table. "Thanks for the dinner."

"It was nothing. You know I would stay kitty but."

"You have family dinner tonight. Rebecca will kill you if you miss it." She spoke trying to show him an 'I am ok' smile. "Tell her I saw hi."

"I will."

As soon James left she sat on the chair almost throwing herself at it, something that is turning into a habit. She was screwed. The man is not going to hire her; the girl that came after her was all sweet and for her clothes not lacking the money she is. The blonde looked like a true librarian. Catherine had put on her best dress that was sure, a floral silk dress that she was desperate to take off. She however needs to see her brother first.

"Hey Stevie." She says kissing her brother's ardent forehead as she notices he is sleeping, or as much sleep he can get with his condition. She has ready to call the night, she had already zipper part of her dress when someone knocked.

"Sorry to come such late hours." Doctor William Stewart is the only doctor in at least 2 blocks so she was used to see him working late nights. From what she gathers the man is married since he was 20, to a pretty woman, and has three children, the oldest one is 16, born the year after hi wedding. They are the picture of a perfect American family.

"I wasn't asleep yet. Please come in." She said to the man as she noticed his eyes on her but said nothing other than offering him something to drink. "I am afraid I don't have your money yet." She spoke sitting next to him on the coach. The only one they had.

"I think we can work something out." His voice was doing a strange thing and before she took noticed his hand was in her knee. She jumped surprised by such forward gesture.

"I don't think." She sallow hard not knowing what to say. "I am trying to get a job." She spoke a little shaken noticing that even with her distancing herself from him, his hand hasn't left her leg.

"We both know you are in deep debt Catherine. Can I call you Catherine." She nods, not knowing what to say, and because he was to right. "I hear you're a pretty good nurse. Just one without a job. How about you come and work for me. I will pay you well enough so you don't need to worry about anything. I can even pay the money you are in debt too. You can keep the house and your brother will have a doctor anytime he needed it. And you will get the job you need."

"What is the price?" She asks. She isn't stupid no one offers something like this without wanting something in return. A big part of her knows what he wants.

"I want you to returns the pleasant favor I am doing for you." He spokes as his hand goes to her zipper pushing it all down. She closes her eyes and bits her lip trying to contain the fear in her.

She knows enough medicine to know Steve won't make it if he doesn't get help.

She knows enough mad to know she will lose the house in the next couple of weeks.

She knows enough about life to-

"Maybe we should go to my room."


End file.
